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Future Trips to Mars
Easier Thanks to MTA & MDOT
Future trips to our red neighbor are to become much easier
thanks to the efforts of the Mars Transit Authority and the Mars
Department of Transportation.
"Frankly, we have to admit that we have a bit of a traffic
problem down on Mars right now, but the new Intersection
Stop-Light Traffic Control system should be installed and
running by the end of this Summer" said Leigh Wey-Kuwanwiswima
of the MDOT.
The chaotic traffic has been the culprit of a few close shaves
or near misses between Mars Rover Spirit and Mars Rover
Opportunity.
Working together, the MTA & MDOT designed are carrying out a
12-step program for Mars that will make getting there and about
much easier. The program includes everything from proper
sign-age indicating distance and direction to Mars, traffic
control, and a traveler's guide to Mars, written by William K.
Hartmannn.
The guide is expected to be invaluable to the Mars rovers, which
did find evidence of water, but in truth, neither of which are
real rocket scientists, and some suspect that they may be ready
for the lunar bin.
Once the Rovers get their travel guide to Mars, look out.
The guide is expected to pop the cap off the Rovers' search for
absolute water. Actually 100% absolute water was the goal, but
the Rovers took a turn for Absolute & water, believing that it
wouldn't be worth the trip unless the water contained some
additives.
 The Mars Transit Authority has also released a straight to VHS
tape documentary recounting the wacky adventures of Spirit and
Opportunity for safety educational purposes. Look for awards at
next years Oscars. The two six hour tapes are full of slap-stick
comedy that will keep the family in stitches for days.
The package is considered a bargain at the low price of $29.99,
and the first ten million units sold will also receive a handy
Martian Sea-Monkeys kit for when water is finally found on Mars.
But that's NOT all!
 Order in the next nine months and receive a beautiful poster of
red potatoes which actually resemble the "faces" of Mars.
Your friends won't know the difference!
JBN Note Pad |
